Dowries have long been a traditional custom, meant not as a “sale” of marriage but as initial financial support from both families to the young couple. This tradition, symbolizing good luck and happiness, has unfortunately been twisted by some into a transactional deal. In some places, strict dowry “standards” are set, with families demanding specific amounts and blocking marriages if those numbers aren’t met. Some even treat dowries as a way to “recover investment” by marrying off daughters. Many couples have broken up over this, which is truly unfortunate.
A recent case in Jiangxi, China, involved a couple who had been together for 6 years. At the last minute, the girlfriend pressured her boyfriend to “empty his pockets” and even borrow money to meet a dowry demand of 488,000 yuan (almost 2 billion VND). Add in costs for a house, car, and wedding party, and the families simply couldn’t afford it. When this story hit social media, it sparked outrage, with many calling it outright robbery.
The guy, from Jiangxi, shared screenshots of their text messages online
Just reading the messages will make anyone laugh and cry at the same time. According to the man, they had been dating for 6 years and were about to get married. But the dowry became a huge obstacle. The girlfriend said dowries in her area were very high, sometimes up to 1 million yuan (3.7 billion VND), and her parents were “being lenient” by asking for only 488,000 yuan (1.8 billion VND).
This amount is huge for most people. Plus, it’s only the dowry, not including the costs for a car, house, or wedding party. For the man, it was a massive sum. Arguments broke out, with harsh words exchanged. The girlfriend accused him of wanting to “freeload,” while he felt she was unreasonable. Eventually, he posted their messages online.
Many netizens shared their opinions after seeing the messages
Some said the guy was clear-headed and right, while the girl was two-faced. The story stirred debate with many viewpoints. But most agreed the dowry was way too high. If marriage means taking on huge debt, what’s the point? Of course, some suspected it might be a staged drama for views.
The guy later posted an audio recording of a conversation with his girlfriend in the car to prove the story was real.
Earlier, on the Qixi Festival, he spent nearly 30,000 yuan (over 100 million VND) on gifts for her, including a gold bracelet and necklace. Despite their fights, he still showed sweetness. Their relationship seemed to improve, with happy moments during meals. He thought the gift helped mend things. But on the way home, when dowry came up again, they clashed.
That’s when he realized their relationship wasn’t about love but a money-driven “deal.” Her attitude made him angrier. He tried to negotiate lowering the dowry since he could only afford 288,000 yuan (about 1 billion VND). She exploded, yelling that if he didn’t have money, he should just borrow it.
The girlfriend’s perspective
She insisted on the high dowry to secure her own future, planning to leave money for her parents and help her brother buy a house for his marriage. The guy thought this was unfair. If he borrowed money and they married, the debt would be shared by both. But she shot back that it was his responsibility, and if he couldn’t pay, he shouldn’t marry. That was the last straw after all their struggles.
The boyfriend decided to break up, despite the deep regret from 6 years of love. Not long after, he bought a brand-new BMW and showed up at her place, demanding she return the expensive gifts he had given. This marked the official end of their 6-year relationship.
From 163.com
